Strawberry Gashes
by Morbidmuch
Summary: She’d never thought she would do this. She had never been one to take the easy way out. Still, she was sitting there on the floor in the dimly lit bathroom, her back against the cool wall. Set after 6x08. Literati. WARNING: Deals with self-harm
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Okaydoki, so this is my second Literati fic ever, and I hope you like it. Big kudos to my beta Edwardmyheroin118.  
WARNING: Deals with self-harm and can be triggering.  
Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls, if I did, Jess would never have left.

* * *

**Strawberry Gashes**

Chapter 1

_I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel_

_I focus on the pain, the only thing that's real_

_--_

She'd never thought she would do this. She had never been one to take the easy way out. Still, she was sitting there on the floor in the dimly lit bathroom, her back against the cool wall. Tears flooded her vision, but she didn't bother to brush them away. She had to though, her grandmother would be home soon, and she had to be finished by then. Picking up the towel laying at her side, she pressed it to her inner-thigh, effectively stopping the bleeding. It burnt, but she didn't flinch. She was used to it. Opening the cabinet, she took out the few bottles of hair products that stood there in order to put in the bloody towel in the far back. She rearranged the bottles so that the towel wasn't noticeable, and stood up.

She cursed the floorlenght mirror on the door, she didn't want it there anymore. When she had first moved in, she loved being able to look at herself, her whole body. Nowadays, she avoided it at all costs. She didn't want to see the red gashes of her unhappiness on her porcelain skin. Still, her eyes studied herself in the mirror. Long brown hair, lighter than it was when she was younger. The same big blue eyes, flooded over with tears. The expensive underwear set she was wearing that had Logan bought her was crimson red, and matched in color the carefully selected places on her body where she could take out her anger, misery and frustration.

She visibly flinched when she heard footsteps coming up the stairs and she quickly put on her bathrobe. The bathroom door opened and he walked in. The smile that once made her heart flutter made her sick, and she found no comfort in his blue eyes, like she used to. She longed for another smile, a crooked one. A rare one.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, her voice bitter. It had been a month since _he _visited, and two weeks since she'd told Logan it was over.

"I want to talk to you, Ace," he tried to convince her that he's sorry, but she didn't fall for it. She asked him to leave, and watched as he gave her a defeated look before he left.

The next day, her grandmother asked her if she'd solved everything with Logan. Like it was just a small lover's quarrel that will be solved quickly. She didn't answer, only stared down in her tea, and wondered what happened to her. She knew that he was right. Why did she change? When did she change? She felt suffocated, and left the breakfast table, ignoring the calls for her. She grabbed her car keys and started to drive. She didn't know where, didn't care.

She was in a downward spiral, had been for a long time. His words were just the tip of the iceberg. As she drove towards an undecided destination tears flooded her vision, making it hard to see the road.

Her whole life people had always wanted to fix everything. What no one realized was that she didn't want someone to 'fix' her. She only wanted someone she could talk to, someone who would accept her and the things she had done. But she had never found that comfort.

She had found a cold metal blade, and it had been introduced to the pale skin of her wrist, and later, her inner thighs.

For over a year they had been secretly meeting, until one day when a crooked smile and a pair of brown eyes found her.

--

He'd dreamed of her for the past month. Dreams that had left him aching for her, for her touch, her smile, her kiss. Seeing her stand there beside her car had felt like heaven. Even when they'd argued. She had stood there with her dyed hair and designer coat, but her eyes hadn't changed. One glance into them, and he had felt like 17 again.

He let out a string of curses when the phone rang, and ran a hand through his hair, making it even messier. He grabbed the phone next to the bed, knocking _Howl _to the floor in the progress.

"What?" he snapped, angry with whoever was calling for disturbing his peace.

_"Jess?" _Luke's worried voice was heard over the phone.

"Hey Uncle Luke," he said sarcastically. "What do you want?" He heard Luke sigh, and then he heard sirens. _Wait a minute, sirens? _"Where are you?" he frowned.

"_I'm in __Hartford, at the hospital,"_ he paused, and Jess waited for him to continue._ "It's Rory," _

Jess heard the words coming out of Luke's mouth, but they didn't made sense. "She's been in an accident or something?" he sounded bitter, but he can't help it. "I'll make sure to send her a get-well card,"

"_Jess,"_his tone was warning, and Jess fought the urge to hit something.

"What? You know, sorry if I'm not beside myself with worry, but I really don't see how this effects me," he was lying, and he knew it.

The next word that came out of Luke's mouth made him drop the phone. _"We think she tried to kill herself," _

Jess cursed and picked up the phone. "I'll be there as soon as I can," he hung up and scrambled out of bed. He pulled on his pants, shoes and shirt in a haste, and grabbed his leather jacket of the floor. He stuffed a few T-shirts, a random sweatshirt, and two pairs of jeans into his cargo duffel bag, and for a split of a second he hesitated before he swept all the random books on his bed into it as well. His hands shook as he grabbed his car keys, and he took the stairs three at the time. As he reached downstairs, both Matt and Chris were there, and they looked up at him, frowning.

"I'm going up to Connecticut, I don't know when I'll be back," he said, and promptly walked out the front door. He didn't care what they thought at the moment, all he could think about is _her_.

As he drove out on the highway, he lit up a cigarette. Memories of him and Rory ran through his mind. Paying 90 dollars for a small basket just so that he could have lunch with her; discussing Ayn Rand and Ernest Hemingway; Buying ice cream, in cones, and crashing her car; their first kiss at Sookie's wedding; their first kiss as a couple; the dance marathon; the time he realized that he loved her; Kyle's party. Sweet memories mixed with bad ones, the ones he wanted to forget about. He felt like he couldn't breathe, and he took deep breaths to try to regain his breathing.

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	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Chapter 2, hope you like it.

Diclaimer: I don't own anything

* * *

**Strawberry Gashes**

Chapter 2

_  
I feel alone here and cold here  
Though I don't want to die  
But the only anesthetic that makes me feel anything kills inside_

_--_

He drove the 150 miles on a record time of two and a half hours, his hands shaking against the wheel the entire time. When he arrived at the hospital, he got out of his car, his bag forgotten, and raced up to the emergency entrance. He asked at the reception for the right floor, and then went to the elevator. Once he had pressed the button that would take him to her floor, he stuck his hands in his pockets. A million thoughts were running through his mind.

Why would she do this? She had seemed fine when he saw her last. Not great, but not like she'd wanted to kill herself. But then again, she'd changed so much since the last time he'd seen her. He probably had something to do with that as well. Luckily for his own mind, the elevator came a a halt, and he didn't have time to think anymore. He walked out when the doors opened, and turned right in the corridor, where he saw slide doors.

As he walked through the slide doors, he stopped. Right in front of him sat Luke, holding a sleeping Lorelai in his arms. On Luke's right sat Emily and Richard Gilmore, both of them silent and not looking at each other. On Lorelai's right sat Lane, crying softly. She was the only one who looked up when she heard him come in. She sprung out of her seat, and wrapped her arms around his waist.

"I'm glad you're here," she whispered, and Jess grabbed her arms and pried her off him.

"Lane, where's Rory?"

"She's sleeping," came Luke's voice, and Jess looked at his uncle.

"Can I see her?" Luke hesitated, and watched as his nephew's eyes turned desperate. "I need to see her,"

"She's in room 124," Luke said softly, compassion in his eyes. Jess gave an almost invisible nod, and then walked off to find Rory's room. As he walked down the hallway, his steps echoed and he suddenly felt like a man on death-row. The stark hospital smell made his nose itch, and he fought the urge to run. The all white walls blinded him, and reminded him off how much he hated hospitals.

Finally, he stood outside her closed door. Carefully, he pressed down the door-handle and opened the door. He stopped when he saw her laying in the hospital bed, her caramel-colored hair spread out like spider's legs on the pillow. She looked so small and fragile lying there, and he rubbed his sore neck. Her eyes darted back and forth under her closed eyelids and he couldn't help but to wonder what she was dreaming about. He literally felt sick to his stomach when he saw the thick white bandage on her left forearm that stretched all the way up to her elbow.

He hesitantly walked into the room, and sat in the uncomfortable looking chair next to her bed. _'why are hospital chairs always so uncomfortable?' _he wondered.

"Rory, what have you done?" His voice was filled with emotion, and he felt his chest tighten. He leaned forward and buried his face in his hands, his elbows leaning on his knees. He looked up when he felt someone stroke his hand, and saw that Rory was awake, and looking at him.

"Hey Dodger," she said softly, her voice tired and her eyes hazy with sleep.

"Hey. How're you feeling?" he carefully took her hand in his, and gently massaged her knuckles. It was an act comfort, and she felt like crying again.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled, her eyes downcast.

"For what?"

"For letting you down. Letting everyone down," she started to cry. "I just couldn't take it anymore. Everything's falling apart,"

"Oh honey," came Lorelai's voice from the doorway, and Jess looked over at her. She had tears running down her face. As she approached the bed, he stood up and dropped Rory's hand.

"I'll leave you two alone," he said and quietly left the room. When he came back to where the others were sitting, he sighed.

"Did she wake up?" Luke asked as Jess sat down in the seat next to him.

"Yeah," he replied, monosyllabic words seemed like the only thing he could say at the moment.

"Did you talk to her?"

"No," he felt Luke's eyes on him, but ignored them. Instead, he rubbed the bridge of his nose. He stood up, the smell of hospital was turning his stomach around. "I need a smoke," and so he left the waiting room. Luke looked after him as he went, sighing and wondering how it would end this time. He clearly remembered the times Jess has left Rory before, and how broken she'd been after each one of those times. He wasn't sure if she could deal with it all again.

Jess only got into the elevator before stress and rage was released from his body. He punched the metal wall hard, hissing in pain when his knuckles made contact with the solid, cool metal. His knuckles were bleeding, but he didn't care. In what seemed like a moment of clarity, he pulled the emergency stop button between floors. He slid down against the wall and lit a cigarette. He didn't know how long he sat there, but he managed to smoke half a packet before he finally had enough.

--

"Mom?" Rory said softly, and Lorelai stroke her hair gently.

"Yeah honey?"

"Could you bring Jess in here? I wanna talk to him,"

Lorelai nodded and stood up. "Sure I will," she dropped a kiss to the top of Rory's head, and then left the room. When she came out to the waiting room, she noticed that Jess wasn't there.

"Where's Jess?" she asked Luke.

"He went out for a smoke," Luke replied, and Lorelai nodded softly before walking in the direction of the elevator. She had no idea why Rory wanted Jess there, but she had learnt that there was no use arguing with Rory about Jess.

When she came to the elevators, the door opened and Jess stepped out, followed closely by a cloud of smoke.

"Geez Jess, are you trying to send smoke signals from there or something?"

Her words triggered his memory.

"_Did you call me at all?"_

"_No,"_

"_Did you send me a letter?"_

"_No,"_

"_Postcard?"_

"_No,"_

"_Smoke signal?"_

"_Stop!"_

"_A nice fruit basket?"_

"_Enough!"_

"Jess?" Lorelai looked worried at the blank look on his face.

"Yeah, sorry. Did you want something?"

"Rory wants to talk to you,"

--

She looked up when a soft knock was heard on the door, and Jess stepped in.

"Your mom said you wanted to talk to me," he said, and walked up to her bed.

"I do," her hands twisted the hospital sheet nervously. "I don't want to talk about what happened,"

He was somewhat relieved by that; he wasn't ready to talk about that, not here, not now. "You don't have to,"

She looked at him, their eyes locking just like so many times before, and she blurted out. "I want to go back to Philadelphia with you,"

* * *

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	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I'm sorry I haven't updated for like two weeks, but I've been super busy and haven't gotten the chance to update. Chapter 4 is already partly written, but I'm also sporting a major case of writers block, so I'm not sure when I'll update again. I'm really excited though for all the reviews I've gotten, like 16 - and that's only on two chapters! I hope that you keep reviewing, and enjoy the show. Italics are flashbacks.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls, I don't even own them on DVD.

* * *

**Strawberry Gashes**

Chapter 3

_  
__I tried to kill the pain  
but only brought more  
I lay dying  
and I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal_

_--_

The car ride was made in silence, both passengers minds were far from the location their bodies were at. Rory's mind was on her mother's and grandmother's argument about her.

"_You can't just ignore this Lorelai, she is your daughter," _

"_That's right, she's __**my**__ daughter. That means you don't get to throw her into a mental institution to discuss her 'issues'. I decide what's best for Rory, not you. She will __not__ be committed."_

"_She needs to talk to a professional," Emily cut in, her arms crossed. _

_Rory couldn't believe what she was hearing. Her grandmother was actually trying to put her in a mental hospital. She rose from the bed and threw the door to her room open. _

"_This woul__d never have happened if you hadn't messed up so much with Christopher,"_

_That was when Rory__'d had enough. "Stop it, both of you!" both Lorelai and Emily turned to look at her, noticing her for the first time. "First of all; I will do what I want to, I'm 21, you can't force me to do anything. Second; I need to get away for a while, so I'm going to Philadelphia with Jess," turning around, she slammed the door shut and went back into her bad. She could still hear the argument, and she sighed. _

She couln't help but to look at him as they drove. It was dark outside, and the many lights along the way made patterns on his skin. Her eyes travelled over his hair, which was shorter now than the last time she saw him, his eyes which were squinted at the moment, the look of concentration on his face, and finally down to his lips. She felt her own lips tingle at the idea of kissing him, but quickly dismissed the thought.

Jess found it difficult to concentrate on the road ahead of him, and not on the woman sitting next to him. The scent of her perfume flared through his nostrils, a scent that hadn't changed over the years.

_She only took one bag from her room at the Gilmore's house.__ It had been stuffed with various clothes and books, and Jess had asked her if she wanted to take more with her. He had been with her, mostly because she didn't want to face her grandmother alone. She had answered 'no' to his question, claiming to have everything she needed. They still hadn't brought up how long she was going to stay, but he knew that he would let her stay as long as she wanted to._

"We're here,"

Rory turned her head from looking out the window to him, and stifled a yawn. "We're there?"

"Yeah," he nodded. They got out of the car and Rory looked up at the dark building they were standing in front of. "Welcome to Truncheon's publishing house,"

"You came up with the name?"

"Yeah, I did,"

A small smile appeared on her face at his words. "London Calling," she said, and then walked up the stone steps to the door.

--

As he gave her the tour of the office and apartment, he could't help but to notice that she was fidgeting with her wrists.

"Where are your co-workers?" she asked as they stood at the foot of the stairs.

"I don't know, they're probably out drinking,"

Later, he knocked on the bathroom door. "Rory, are you okay in there?" he didn't want to leave her alone too long, thinking she might to something. She opened the door, and he felt his chest tighten at the sight. She was dressed in boy shorts panties and a tank top that leaves her midriff bare. For the first time, he laid eyes on the scars on her arms and thighs, and it made him want to hold her and not let go until everything was okay.

"It was the only thing I could find, I was in a hurry" she said softly, eyes downcast.

"I can lend you a shirt of something if you want to..." his voice trailed off, and she nodded slightly.

"Yeah, thanks,"

He disappeared into his bedroom, and rummaged through his closet to find a shirt. He grabbed a long sleeved dress shirt and walked back to the bathroom.

"Rory?" He knocked softly on the door, and she opened it slightly.

"Thank you," she said, and gave a small smile.

"I figured you'd want something with long sleeves," he explained, and she nodded. She took it from him and then closed the door again. He walked back to the bedroom to change, stifling a yawn in the meantime. It had been a hectic 48 hours. His closet was open, and he thought about what to wear to sleep. He usually slept in his boxers, but it might make her uncomfortable, so he grabbed a pair of sweatpants and a wife-beater and put them on.

As soon as she heard his footsteps fade, she brought the shirt up to her nose and inhaled. His scent hadn't changed, and her brain flooded with memories. Slipping it on, she buttoned the tiny buttons one by one and looked at herself in the mirror. Strangely, she felt good knowing she was wearing his clothes.

He turned around when he heard her footsteps, and felt his breath hitch in his throat. The shirt was exactly long enough to cover her most private areas, but left her legs bare.

"It looks good on you," he said, a small smile playing across his lips. She smiled self-consciously, fidgeting with the sleeves. "You can have th bed, I'll go set up the couch."

"I can't kick you out of your own bad; I'll take the couch,"

"No, it's okay," he argued back. "You just call if you need anything," he turned around and started to leave, but her voice stopped him.

"Jess?"

He turned around, "Yeah?"

"I need you," she said simply. "Could you...stay here?"

He looked at her for a moment, and then nodded. "Sure," he waited for her to get under the covers first, and then followed her. To give her the space he figured she needed, he made sure that he wasn't touching her. But when he noticed the heartbroken look on her face, he reached out and touched her arm.

"Hey, you wanna talk about it?"

She looked at him, and her eyes spoke of doubt and fear. "Could we turn out the light? I'd feel more comfortable,"

"Sure," he got up and turned off the light before crawling back into bed. He could make out her silhouette as his eyes adjusted to the dark, and waited patiently for her to begin.

* * *

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	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls

* * *

**Strawberry Gashes**

Chapter 4

_The poison that runs its course through her  
pale white skin with strawberry gashes  
all over__, all over_

--

"First I want to say that I didn't try to kill myself,"

He frowned. "Why did you tell them you did?"

"I never told them, but it looked like I tried to. It was just easier to let them think that I did,"

"Then what happened?"

"I..." he could hear her voice crack, and moved a bit closer to put a comforting hand on her shoulder. "I started cutting over a year ago. I can't tell you why, because you wouldn't understand," she paused, and closed her eyes. For a brief second, she was back in the bathroom where it had happened, so she opened her eyes again. "It wasn't supposed to happen that way, honestly. I was in so much pain, I couldn't resist it anymore. I made a tiny knick in my wrist, but it didn't give me the relief I craved, so I pushed deeper and tugged harder," she felt so vulnerable telling him this, and was glad the darkness gave her a small sense of being able to hide. Feeling her way around until she found his hand, she then pressed it against her left wrist.

He could clearly feel the abrasions on her porcelain skin, even though most of her arm was made up by the bandage. He stroke her skin gently, on the sides of the bandage. Rory had trouble breathing. The feeling of his fingers gently stroking her scars kicked her senses into overdrive. She looked up at him, and moved closer to him, pressing her body against his.

"Thank you for letting me come here," she gave a half smile before she remembered he couldn't see her.

"It was no problem, you know that. I'm glad you came," he felt her hand stroke his cheek.

"Me too," she replied low, and then carefully pressed her lips against his. She automatically closed her eyes as she brought her hand up around his neck. He started kissing her back, too lost in the feeling of her lips on his to realize what he was doing. It was when her other hand went to the hem of his shirt, however, that he pushed her away.

"Whoah, Rory, hold on for a second," he sat up and turned on the lamp so that he could see her. She too sat up, and hugged her knees to her chest. She looked so fragile and lost the he drew her into his arms. "We shouldn't do this, you know that,"

She looked up at him, an unreadable emotion in her blue eyes. "Why not? Are you disgusted with me or something?" a flash of hurt ran across her face. _'why doesn't he want me anymore?'_ she thought. _'Is it because what I've done?'_

Jess's eyes widened. "Rory, I could never be disgusted by you. You are still the only woman I love, and you know that," she couldn't help but to feel her heart flutter a bit at his words.

"Then why don't you want me?"

"I don't want to take advantage of you," she opened her mouth to speak, but he held up a hand to stop her. "No, let me finish. I've wanted you for 4 years, but not like this. Not while you're hurting. Can you understand that?"

She nodded, her eyes downcast. He tilted her head up so that he could look into her eyes, that were currently flooding with tears.

"How about we get some sleep?" he asked, a small smile playing across his lips, and she nodded. Turning out the light he brought her closer to her, and kissing the top of her head. "Sleep Rory,"

She closed her eyes, resting her head on his chest and wrapping an arm around his waist. It felt unbelievingly good to be this near him after all this time, and she wondered how she ever managed to sleep without him. Matching her breaths to his, she let his soft fingers running through her hair guide her to sleep.

--

When Rory woke up, she wondered where she was. Sitting up, she looked around before the previous night came crashing down on her. She realized then that she was alone, and she kicked off the covers before getting out of bed. She walked towards the kitchen, painfully aware that her legs were bare. Her scars were covered, but not by much. Suddenly, a voice was heard.

"Uh, hello?"

She looked up, and felt her face flush. In the kitchen stood a young african american man with untidy black hair and a curious expression on his face. She was too stunned to say anything, and only looked at him.

"I'm Chris," he said as he took one step forwards. "You must be Rory?"

She managed to nod, and turned a deeper shade of red when she realized that he had a perfect vision of her bare legs. Talk about embarrassing.

"Chris man, don't upset her," came Jess's voice, and Rory looked past the guy named Chris and saw Jess standing there, looking at them.

"I didn't say anything, man, chill out," he offered Rory a smile, and then left.

"I'm sorry about him, he's not completely house-broken yet," Jess smiled, walking up to her.

"I woke up and you were gone," she said quietly, not wanting him to know the panic she had felt.

"I had to open the store, but I was coming up to wake you now. It's almost noon,"

For the first time, Rory looked up at the time and saw that it was, in fact, almost noon. "I guess I was more tired than I thought," she half smiled, and he returned the gesture.

"You hungry?" he asked. Upon seeing her nodding, he continued. "We could order Indian food if you like,"

She raised an eyebrow. "But you hate Indian food," she stated, and he reached up to brush away a strand of hair from her face.

"Yeah, but you love Indian Food,"

She felt her heart tug a bit at the gesture. "Sure, let me just go and get dressed,"

--

As the day turned to evening, Rory felt panic rise in her. There was an open house at Truncheon in an hour, and she realized that Jess had to be down there, hosting. She wanted to be there with him, as support, but being around that many people made her nervous.

"Rory?"

She looked up from the book she had been reading, and met Jess' concerned eyes. He stood in the doorway, looking concerned at her. He looked great, and she felt her cheeks fluster. He was wearing dark blue jeans, a black blazer and a white t-shirt.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she assured him, but could see that he didn't believe her. He walked in and sat down next to her on the bed, and she put down the book. She smiled a bit when she saw the print on his shirt. "Hey, I'm on your shirt," she joked, and he raised an eyebrow, giving her an amused look even though the corners of his mouth tugged upwards.

"Are you coming down later?" he knew that she would be uncomfortable with that many people around, but a big part of him wanted her there with him.

"I don't know," she confessed. He watched her for a second before reaching out and stroking her cheek gently.

"It's your choice," he said, and stood up. He started to walk away, and she looked after him. He turned around in the doorway. "I'll wait for you there," he offered a simple smile, and then left.

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	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: This is the last chapter of this story, and I wanted to thank everybody who's reviewed. I hope that you'll like this chapter :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls.**

* * *

**Strawberry Gashes**

Chapter 5

_The warmth of your embrace  
Melts my frostbitten spirit  
You speak the truth and I hear it  
The words are I love you  
And I have to believe in you_

_--_

Rory paced the room for almost 20 minutes, trying to decide whether to go down or not. She could hear soft Indie music play downstairs, the buzz of many people talking at the same time, and a strange feeling came over her.

"It'll be fine, no one will know," she muttered, wringing her hands. Her knuckles cracked and she sighed. "I'm going," she was determined, and walked quickly downstairs before her nerves got the best of her.

She kept her head down as she walked, and pulled down the sleeves of her shirt further, making sure that she was fully covered. Thankfully, no one looked twice at her, and she felt herself grow more comfortable and confident. She smiled when she saw Jess, and started to walk over to him, but her smile faded when she saw how he was talking to.

"Luke," she said, and both Jess and Luke turned around.

"Rory," Luke stated, looking a bit surprised. Not that he should be, he'd been there when Rory and Jess drove to Philadelphia. "How are you?"

She hesitated. To say that she was fine was an overstatement, but to say that wasn't fine wasn't true either. "I'm not _not_ fine. But I'm not fine either," she paused, thinking over what she'd just said. She gave a small laugh. "That was confusing,"

Luke smiled. He could see that she was better already. Her eyes held some of the old spark in them, and she wasn't as pale as before. "I understand what you meant. I hope Jess is treating you alright,"

She nodded. "Yeah, he is. He even let me order Indian food for lunch," Jess snorted, and gave her an amused look.

Luke let out a laugh. "That's good, that's good. I was just saying to Jess that I should get going,"

"Oh, okay," Rory fidgeted. "Tell mom I said hi, okay?"

Luke nodded, a weak smile on his face. "I will kiddo, I will," he turned to Jess. "Than's for having me here,"

"No problem. You should swing by some other time, just let me know,"

"I will. Bye," Luke left, and Jess looked at Rory, touching her shoulder gently.

"Are you okay? With all the people I mean,"

"Yeah, it's okay. Aren't you going to show me around?"

"Yeah, come on,"

He led her around, showing her the different paintings and making jokes just to hear her laugh. His hand rested on the small of her back the entire time, as a comfort in case it got too much for her. Soon, she had relaxed completely and was almost back to her old self. Then, her cell phone rang, and when she looked at the Called ID she nearly had a heart attack. _Logan_.

"I've gotta take this, I'll be right back," she told Jess and walked upstairs, answering at the same time.

"Hello?"

"_Hi Ace, it's me. Where are you?"_

"You're not my boyfriend anymore Logan, I don't have to tell you anything," she said calmly, sitting down on Jess's bed.

"_Your grandmother told me to call you, but I don't know why,"_

Rory felt rage build up inside of her. Off course Emily Gilmore had something to do with this. "Tell her to mind her own business, and that I'm not gonna leave Philly,"

"_Wait, Philly?"_ he paused. _"You're with him, aren't you?"_

"That is none of your business. I just wanted to tell you that I regret dating you. You never noticed how I was feeling,"

"_What do you mean?" _

"Are you saying that not one time when you touched me you noticed the scars?" she couldn't believe that he could be so ignorant.

"_Which scars?"_

"You know what, I don't want to talk to you anymore. Don't call me again, and don't try to see me. I'm done with you," she hung up, and looked up when a voice was heard from the doorway.

"You okay?" it was Chris, and he looked concerned at her. "Jess told me to go check if you were okay. He tried to get away, but couldn't,"

"Yeah, just an ex-boyfriend,"

"I know that you don't know me that well, but you can talk to me if you want to," he smiled and Rory gave a small one herself. "Plus, any girl in love with that loser is alright in my book," he left, and Rory was left behind in shock.

In love? Was she in love with Jess? She had feelings for him, she knew that, but was it love? Was she capable of love? The answer hit her like a brick wall.

"I'm in love with Jess," she spoke out loud, before a small grin covered her face. Standing up, she dropped her phone on the bed and walked downstairs again. She couldn't wait to tell him.

She found him standing in a corner, looking at an abstract painting. She came up behind him, raising her hand to grab his shoulder. He turned around, and smiled when he saw her.

"Hey. You okay?"

She smiled big. "I'm great," he gave her a confused look, and she figured this was now or never. Walking in close to him, she wrapped an around around his neck before kissing him. His lips felt so right on her own, and she ran her tongue across his lower lip asking for entrance. He opened his mouth and pulled her near as their tongues danced. It wasn't so much a dance for dominance, but more a dance of belonging, knowing exactly what to do. She pulled back, and looked deep into his eyes.

"I love you," she whispered, and his eyes got wide, disbelieving. "I love you," she repeated, stroking his hair with one hand and touching his cheek with the other.

"I love you too," he replied, his voice low. "I love you so much," he leaned down to kiss her again, and she smiled again his mouth. It seemed that finally, finally, her life had a meaning again. And that meaning was Jess. Forever.

* * *

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